partners having verbal fight

partners having verbal fight

Marriage and relationships have seen a significant transformation in recent years. Consider the following: according to the U.S. According to the Census Bureau, over 440,000 couples of the opposite sex lived together outside of marriage in 1960. By the year 2000, the figure had risen to slightly over 3.8 million couples in cohabitation. 

In only 14 years, the number of couples had more than quadrupled to just around 8 million! 

  • Cohabitation is like a beta test marriage for an increasing number of couples, especially younger ones—a trial run to determine if they can make it work as husband and wife. As one lady put it in Psychology Today, “I couldn’t fathom being married to anybody I hadn’t put through a test as a roommate.” Conjoin with someone before using the restroom? Unlikely!

The substantial increase in cohabitation can be attributed to several causes. Many couples think that living together is an excellent way to see if their relationship will endure before committing marriage. Living together is the typical sort of pre-marriage relationship seen in many movies and television shows. Sometimes it appears like the only couples that do not cohabitate before marriage are those in Hallmark Channel shows. 

Does cohabitation work as a test? 

God’s Word is quite clear about waiting until marriage to enjoy the sexual union. But let us also consider cohabitation as a prelude to marriage: Does living together truly help you see if you are compatible? 

While many couples feel that cohabitation replicates a married connection, many academics and counselors argue that it is only a phony imitation of the real thing. Dr. Willard Harley says in a letter to a couple living together, “… I recommend that you explore why couples who live together do not marry.” That is the question you should be asking yourself. Why did you decide to live with your lover rather than marry him? 

The explanation is that you were not yet ready to commit to him. You wanted to test whether you still loved him after you had made dinners, cleaned the flat, and slept together.  In other words, you wanted to experience married life without the commitment of marriage. 

But what you don’t seem to comprehend is that unless you’re married, you’ll never know what married life is like. Marriage adds a level to your relationship that turns everything on its head. You’re now putting each other to the test to determine whether you’re compatible. Marriage does not function like that. Slip-ups do not terminate the marriage [in your instance], but they do end your love for one other.