Happy wedding photography of bride and groom at wedding ceremony. Wedding tradition sprinkled with rice and grain

According to John Ortberg, “Joy is God’s essential nature.” His everlasting destiny is joy. God is the most contented entity in the universe.” Joy, gladness, and laughter are all aspects of God’s personality. How can we instill joy in our marriages through our habits? 

When Nehemiah stated this, the Israelites were in the midst of a tragedy and struggle. When you’re in the midst of a valley—and some of you are right now—you need to realize that the power you require comes from God’s joy center. 

Marriage joy has the power to change a household. I (Ann) have the impression that there is a storm brewing outside our doors in our civilization. When our family enters through the door, we can create an atmosphere of joy, love, and Holy Spirit fruit. 

The question is, where do you find happiness? “Always rejoice in the LORD,” Paul stated. Rejoice!” I’ll tell it again: rejoice!” He’s detailed here. If you seek joy, look to the Lord in your habits. 

We all seek happiness in our marriages. 

Most of the time, we seek happiness in the person we marry. We believe that once we are married, we will always be happy. That is not how it works. 

 He taught that the most potent motivators in the world were fear of death and desire for sex. The discovery of the brain magnet, on the other hand, has demonstrated that attachment—specifically, happy attachment—is the most potent motivator in life.

For greater joy in your marriage, you need a P-L-A-N. You need to understand your habits and make accommodations.

1. Play more together.

One day, I was standing in the kitchen when I noticed our 16-year-recently old’s acquired secondhand vehicle begin rolling down the driveway—with no one in it! So I dashed out the door, but before I could reach the car, it had collided with a tree, causing damage to the front bumper. That’s going to cost money, I reasoned. And I became enraged. 

Ann came out, laughing uncontrollably. The boys then came out, and I noticed them physically moving away from me and closer to her as they began to laugh. Why? Because the habits of laughing attract people. 

People want to be in places where there is laughing because Christ brings joy. There shouldn’t have been so much delight at this moment, yet at some point, that laughing trickled back to me because you know what? It’s a bumper sticker. It is repairable. 

2. Look for signs of emotion.

Don’t only listen to what your wife is saying. What exactly is she saying? What is the meaning of her words? 

I (Dave) had just preached three services all day Sunday and was weary when I got home. Ann whispered to me as I lay in bed that night, “I only wish the man who headed Kensington Church lived in this place as well.” 

I heard that I don’t lead at home; I don’t pray as I do on stage… and I became enraged. 

Recognizing what she was saying when she said, “I don’t feel loved.” Or witnessed. I’m not feeling guided. I don’t consider you to be my spiritual leader in your habits. 

It was everything my congregation thought of me publicly that she didn’t think about me privately. And here’s what I’ve realized: it’s more essential for me to lead her and my family than a congregation of thousands of people—and I was missing it.